time to let go

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time to let go

By Alice |21 January, 2020| 246

Overview


Sometimes, all you can do is lie in bed, and hope to fall asleep before you fall apart.


I’m ready to self destruct.

Please, just hold me while I leave.

I don’t want to do this, but,

A part of you will go with me.

I keep trying to run away,

Now you say you need me to stay

Don’t look at me,

Please don’t look at me that way.

And when it’s late at night,

I have you on my mind.

The time we used to spend

Has now come to an end,

And it feels like I just don’t know you anymore.

 

I’ll put my life in danger,

Don’t worry, you’ll start talking to a stranger.

I can’t let go

Of you,

So I got to run away.

 

Tell me that you miss

What we had,

Every single kiss

That made me feel so sad.

I’m done feeling worthless, imperfect

You hit me where it hurts.

You put the blade right on my wrist,

Slit until it spurt out

Blood red.

Dead.

That’s just how I’m feeling.

 

Tell me that you love me,

Then you go and leave me,

Why

You so surprised?

You’re a demon in disguise.

These past few weeks all I’ve been doing is cry.

 

I’m not enough, and I’m sorry.

You can see the dread in my eyes,

Cause I’m not going to survive.

And you think that I’m okay

Cause

I won’t let you see my true face.

I feel like there is no help.

Feel like I’m trapped in my own head

Now I want to see my happy end.

Can you save me from my own dread?

 

I’m not okay.

I’m fine,

But I’m not okay.

I am not heartless,

I just can’t feel anything

I’m mixing rum with coke inside of a coffin.

 

You left me, no problem,

I’ve never been flawless,

So maybe another pill will make this okay.

I’ve been feeling oh so low, now.

Trying to do my best, I don’t know how.

But I’ve been consumed with doubt.

Carrying the weight of the world upon my shoulders,

Maybe it would have gotten better if I had gotten older.

Time for me to go,

You need some room to grow.

 

I feel so alone,

No one will even notice.

Just want to disappear,

Take me away from here.

I don’t want to face my fears,

I just want to disappear.

I wake up, say my grace, and close my eyes

I forget what it’s like to exist.

Maybe it’s time to let go.

WRITER: Alice

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