Overview

Adorably framed, her pictures hang peacefully around their living room. They bring life into the room. Every one captures her happy memories. She's bubbly. It's her birthday today. The family is celebrating ; her memorial instead. Sadness written all over their faces, her physical absence is tangible. A life not lived had already been taken. I took it. This is about a couple that lost their first child and this seemed like a test on their relationship. Does love always prevail? 

I was excited to go back home no longer a primary school pupil. I had just completed my class 8 national exam and among the things I yearned for was to see the newest member of our family, their first child. My step brother and his fiance got engaged a year ago but turned out she had issues with her reproductive system and couldn't sire children earlier. It was tough for her, for all of us.  She wanted a complete family. After many consultations with the doctors, she heard what she always wanted to hear. She was happy. We all were. Her whole nine-month journey was smooth without any complications as she followed every instruction to the latter. 

      I had been at their place for nearly 5 weeks and the baby was already at 9 months. The better part of my day was spent with me sitting next to her, playing or just watching her sleep. Everything went well. Traditions will always be there to be followed. And as it dictates, the elders must come to present the child and this was a whole ceremony that kept everyone on toes to ensure nothing goes wrong. The last week had been a rehearsal week for everything. 

     Relatives began streaming in their home early that day. All children were directed to one of the bedrooms to play. And being an ‘adult’ I was left to watch them. The game was bouncing on the bed and then falling down. I had the baby where I made her jump gently and lay her down. Everything was fine until I decided to use the washroom and left the baby in her cot. Suddenly, screams. Silence. Gasps. Everyone ran to the bedroom to check what was going on. For nearly 10 seconds, we all watched silently, our mouths agape as the red stain formed on her pink bedding. She was bleeding, heavily. People looked at each other in shock the kids were shivering in fear others crying. 

     One of the uncles quickly grabbed her and rushed into the car to get her to hospital. Her demise was declared upon her arrival. My sister in law was still in shock. She fainted and she too was taken to hospital. Everyone then turned to me to ask what I did. I only had one job and I failed. I couldn't even justify myself because I was left to watch them and I literally left. (While I was away, the other children took her from her cot and decided to go on with the game. When they fell on the bed, she was thrown and she hit the head of the bed with her head from behind).  

      I had denied my only sister the chance of being a mother to her own child. This was her miracle baby and I took that away from her. I had ruined a relationship, a family, love, a blessing; name it. 

        My sister in law went into a coma for 9 months. Their life was not the same again. She could not bear any children. The only option was adoption. My brother tried being strong for her. Even though it was clear he too was suffering inside. He was always by her side. It was necessary. I couldn't live with it. I have always had nightmares. Efforts of trying to make me get better have shown some growth but I found solace in putting it down on paper. It helps me get things off my chest. It is my story and it's finally time I tell it. 

WRITER: Natty