Overview

My dating life in a few words can be explained as some sort of disastrous movie where the lead character seems to never have it all. Starting off with being cheated on, becoming the other woman in a relationship and also getting ghosted. It gets to a point you just want to date yourself or stay single.

As a young lady in the city, I was anxious about the prospects of dating in Nairobi. In such a busy town, a Lady is bound to find love at some point. Being a big movie junkie, especially the romcoms ...I expected to meet a guy at some point. There are so many hangout spots to meet someone with desirable qualities that manage to check on my list and most ladies do have those kind of lists.

My extensive movie watching led me to believe or rather hope that I'll meet a guy in these coffee houses or restaurants or even bump into one in the mall or lift or something. The very first guy that I actually dated was Leo and I was quite the naive girl. New to the dating scene, I’d definitely go for the nice guy since nice guys don't break girl's hearts. Started off so well...getting ice cream, visiting the mall, Netflix and chill...just the usual. Gets to Monday you post 'your man' with the cutest and corniest captions babe, love of my life and such, Wednesday the same for vice versa. People are in love and start talking about the kids they'd want, the names they'd give. You’re so in love and get comfortable. After a while Leo is unusually busy and not able to show up for dates. Meanwhile, am just chilled thinking he's out there grinding. You give him his space to work on himself and fend. There is a nagging thought in the back of my mind though but I don't want to react on impulse so I wait it out. Supporting him when and how I can.Shock on me when I later find out these ladies were just grinding on him whenever am not around. Dude got himself someone else hence explains his absence.

How to get over heartbreak? Well, by just getting back out there and where's the perfect place to meet someone? You've guessed it right, the wedding. My best friend and I got invited to a wedding one fine weekend. We got our hair done, nails, put on dresses and heels looking our best ourselves for the day. Eating mingling dancing having fun. As the day comes to a close, we’ve met new people and planned to continue with the conversation at the after party. Where there are drinks, something is bound to happen. Got close to a guy Stephen and moved the party to meeting during the weekdays. He was super different and had quite the ear to listen. We met a few times and gone out for drinks in the evenings. I didn't expect much but living the moment. Whenever we're together however, he insists we keep our phones away since we don't need them. I didn't think much of it at first but then again we ignore red flags all the god dammed time. I loved my privacy and so did he, we never got into each other’s phones and I guess that was kinda sorta my fault. Because if I did, I'd have probably found out earlier that he was in a relationship and had a girlfriend. I was so caught up thinking that I found the ying to my yang that I didn't see through his facade. As reality dawned on meme couldn't stomach my situation and let him go.

Heartbroken and having no intention of meeting anyone, I took a well-deserved break. A couple of months passing, guys shooting their shots but not into the vibe. I was living my best life being single. Or so I thought. Meeting Martin was not expected but surely very much appreciated. I kept on seeing this guy in different places and sometimes with friends. He was some sort of an enigma. His some sort of 'bad boy’ persona always seemed appealing. Dude has bars on bars making a girl feel special and all. The right words the right timing, where could we go wrong. Being a softie and a hopeless romantic, I started 'catching feelings'. So I decide to have the what are we conversation and giving him an ultimatum. He's quick to smooth talking me and I get the feeling we're good. He was from out of town and definitely he ought to get back to his place. Few days of parting ways, we’re not talking. Shock on me since I was not being texted back and my calls not getting answered. I was ghosted and had no other option but to crawl back into her cocoon. Here I can be away from everybody and everything.

It’s been seven months three weeks fourteen hours eight minutes and counting since I decided to take a break on the whole dating scene.Ive been so unlucky in love that I opted to quit. Thinking to myself, when love wants me, it will surely find me. Throwing the towel for I am tired of falling for guys who don't consider my feelings, cheat on me and lie blankly. Deciding to focus, loving, taking myself out and surrounding myself with friends. You can't truly love anyone until you love yourself and hence I am dating myself. The odds are in my favour and we make such a cute singlet.

WRITER: Cece